Look, I admire Woodwards. It's a very friendly family-run business that has, over the years, seen its fair share of action. If you know the owners, there's no reason you won't be happy staying there. They'll take good care of you.
But, should you dine at this fine "resort," (two-star motel) be aware that the person cooking your food in the kitchen is actually just your fifth grade lunch lady equipped with a flamethrower.
I never knew that medium-rare flat iron steak was a piece of charcoal with an orange next to it! Well, she is lunch lady, and it is, after all, a meal plan.
Woodwards seems to have made revolutionary contributions to American cuisine; I've never forced down anything like a Woody Burger, or faced difficulty in deciding whether to eat my wilted garnish before the actual meal. There's nothing out there taking $15 an entrée that's as bad as this place, and nobody seems to say anything.
When they say "char-broiled," they're serious. Many a time have I been dragged along to Woodwards on school trips (5, exactly), arrived at the restaurant on the verge of starvation, and left feeling as if I'd gone and chewed on a rubber disc that we'd shoved up the exhaust back in MA. It's rare that you'll taste good meat at Woodwards--- because they basically just pour gasoline on the beast and let 'er rrrip.
I try at least one "ambitious" dish (beyond pasta or salad, usually beef of some sort) every time I visit Woodwards, and I'm always offended by how burnt, dry and thoughtless it is.
Breakfast can be all right, so apparently frying eggs is easier than flipping burgers. When you pour it, the coffee is the color of watered down iced tea.
I'm warning you all, the food is so so so so so so [--] mediocre at this place-- You have to taste to believe. Do not get the meal plan, and be prepared to drive many miles for BK or something.
Mr. and Mrs. Woodward (they're real, I met them) please do something about this. Usually, I eat a lot. I'm not picky, and I've made do with some pretty nasty board. When I stay at your "resort," I can't bear to consume anything other than plain Caesar salad and cigarettes. It's not good for me.
For those about to brave the Woodwards pickins, I assure you that you won't find anything less horrible on the menu than the Caesar Salad. Do not get shrimp, I repeat, do not get shrimp (unless you poke the cork into your wine and need a substitute).
Sorry guys, your restaurant sucks. And deal with the mould problem already!
- Official Description (provided by the hotel):
- Woodwards Resort and Inn offers 142 well-appointed rooms with compact refrigerators, coffee makers, and complimentary Wi-Fi. This "stay & play" property features a family-friendly restaurant open for breakfast and dinner seasonally, Pub with stone fireplace and outdoor deck overlooking a duck & trout pond, 2 indoor and outdoor pools, sauna, Jacuzzi, tennis & racquetball courts and a variety of seasonal on-site activities including outdoor summer movies and lighted ice skating pond with free skates available. The Inn building, located 300 yards north of The Resort, offers budget-standard rooms and family suites with kitchenettes, separate living rooms, Jacuzzi tubs, and fireplaces. Seasonal restaurant specials offered and local area attraction tickets are available for purchase at the front desk. ... more less
- Reservation Options:
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- Also Known As:
- Woodward`s Hotel Lincoln
- Woodwards Hotel Lincoln
- Woodwards Resort & Inn New Hampshire/Lincoln, White Mountains